The Neighbors is being recapped and reviewed today because I mistakenly believed that it was on hiatus this week. Sorry about that folks, and next week, The Neighbors will appear as usual on it’s regularly scheduled day.
The episode opens with The Weavers driving around scoping out houses to take their children to for Halloween. They see a house with no car in the driveway and drawn blinds and Marty believes that it will mean a bucket full of candy, with a note which says, “please take one.” Marty and Debbie high five each other saying, “suckers.” From the backseat Amber says, “excuse me parents, you’re setting a bad example for your children. I hope you’re aware of that.” Debbie responds, “do you have any idea how long your father and I have fantasized about not taking you shopping in an apartment building?” Marty actually has to ask several times what the family favorite holiday is before the children get around to saying Halloween.
When the Weavers return home, they find the Zabrvonians electrifying the fence of their gated community and nailing wood across the windows. Marty sends the kids in the house and asks Larry Bird and Jackie Joyner-Kersee what’s going on. Larry Bird says, “Every year since we’ve arrived, on the last day of your October, tiny devils have gathered at our main gate ready to invade.” Okay clearly we have yet another case of culture clash going on. This schtick is becoming old fast. Debbie explains that they are not being invaded and that the kids are just celebrating Halloween. The Weavers bring the Zabrvonians into their home and show them the costumes the kids are making. Debbie suggests that the Zabrvonians stop preparing for war and start buying candy. Jackie Joyner-Kersee says that it all seems harmless but Larry Bird does not concur. Larry replies, “ever great leader in history is defined by the threat he protected his people from. Your Churchill had Hitler, my father led the invasion of Uranus, and I protect my people from October 31st. Every year, I guide them safely through the evening and they celebrate me for it. It’s my war and I want to keep it.”
On the bus, Dick Butkus tells Max that all of the other kids are putting together Halloween costumes and he feels so alone because he does not have one. Max tells him that he can put together a good easy costume easily. Dick tells Max that Larry Bird believes Halloween is dangerous. Max says that Marty is super into Halloween and that they do a costume together every year. Emma interrupts the conversation to invite the Weaver kids to go with them and says that they go door to door without their parents. At the high school, Reggie Jackson approaches Amber about her costume and agrees to go as the universal mandate to match her costume as Obamacare. Amber admits that she is gaming her parents, as she intends to use Halloween to jump start her popularity. Abby says, “despite my better judgement, I have decided to sex up my costume this year.” The popular kids walk by and the girl argues for the boy to wear a costume as well because she doesn’t want to look like a slut. When they walk by, Amber tells Reggie Jackson, “Gossip girl does have a point. I can’t be too obvious about it. I have to be stealth sexy. It’s got to be a thing. Okay Reggie, you can be my costume partner.” Amber packs up her stuff and says that they are going as a slutty nurse and a hot doctor.
Back at The Weavers, Debbie is pinning Marty’s tail on and Jackie admits that she explained to the rest of the community The Weavers interpretation of Halloween. She admits that this is their first human holiday, that the Weavers are their first human friends and that they would like to learn more about it. When Debbie asks about Larry Bird, Jackie says that she told him that his hair looked limp and he will be deep conditioning for hours. Marty tells Jackie that they would be happy to help but they have their own celebration to get ready for. Amber walks in picks up her costume and says that the skirt needs to be shorter and the neckline needs to be deeper. Debbie asks if Amber is making a statement that without healthcare people won’t be able to afford full length skirts and Amber replies, “yeah totally.” Amber decides to make the alterations herself and heads upstairs. The Weavers start freaking out because they have realised that Amber has outgrown punny Halloween costumes and has gone slutty. Max and Abby enter the room and throw another wrench in The Weaver Halloween plans. This year, Max wants to be a zombie like all of the other kids and Abby no longer wants to hold her parents hand. Marty sits on the couch and asks Debbie whats happening and Jackie interjects and says that they now have the time to teach them about Halloween.