Fangs For The Fantasy

Rhoda is 41 years old, overweight, Jewish and looking for a Jewish man to settle down with after her marriage broke up and she’s had a series of poor relationships since then. Just her luck that the first man who seems interested isn’t a man at all – he’s a vampire. But at least he’s Jewish. And he’s into her – zaftig and all.

Dating a vampire isn’t easy, especially not a vampire in an orthodox community when you’re anything but. Rhoda has to work through her own personal insecurities as well, as someone who has been through the wringer a few times already, it’s hard to be so invested in someone who is so very different; Rhoda flails between worry about their relationship to desperately trying to make it work even while Sheldon has to deal with his own family and friends.

And then there’s Rhoda’s mother with the heart condition. She has to go through yet another horrendous surgery or she won’t live much longer – and at 81, that surgery doesn’t look too safe. Unable to stand the thought of life alone, Rhoda makes the leap into seeing her mother – and her friends “the goils” become a vampire and join the Golden Grandmas – a network of elderly vampire women.

But while undeath brings her mother a new lease of life and energy, allowing her to throw herself into activities she hasn’t enjoyed in decades, it also brings with it a disturbing blood lust, a hunger that drives her to the darker side of life and death. And one that leaves bodies in its wake – and the possible attention of the vampire authorities

There is a wonderful sense of Jewish culture – Rhoda and her family and contacts are all very real people who live their culture and carry it with them at all times. It’s in their language, their food, their family bonds, their history and their understanding. It’s funny without being mocked, heavy without being stereotyped. It’s used for in community jokes but never outside mockery. It’s funny, it’s witty and the characters are extremely real and natural. The characters make this book.

We also have some fascinating conflicts – Sheldon being torn between his fellow Hasids and fellow vampires, whether Rhoda, a non-kosher, non-practicing Jew would fit in with such a traditional, orthodox family and, of course Goldie, Sheldon’s golem who is determined to see him settle down with a nice, orthodox, Jewish vampire. I’m also really disappointed with how Goldie was handled, especially since she’s clearly a stand in for Sheldon’s mother. I would rather have had reconciliation rather than the future wife having to kill her future mother-in-law for the wedding to even happen.

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In real life, motherhood is many things. It is love and bonding, affection and protection and most certainly inspiration. Mothers have been inspired to incredible feats over the years on behalf of their children, for their children and for the world their children live in. We have a world where motherhood can be a great strength and a source of great power and resolve.

In Game of Thrones, however, motherhood seems to coincide with victimhood - being a mother is rarely, if ever, a source of strength for the mothers of Westeros, but so often another avenue through which they can be vulnerable, attacked and manipulated

This is, perhaps, clearest of all with Cersei Lannister, Queen of the 7 Kingdoms, and mother of Joffrey, Marcella and Tommen. Cersei has lead a life with little love and a great deal of harshness. A callous father lead to a loveless marriage which in turn has lead to her seeing love as a weakness. She openly advises Sansa not to love because to love is to leave one vulnerable to being hurt. And with that assertion she has another lament - that you cannot help but love your children, she sees her children as an weakness.

And, considering her eldest son, it’s no surprise. Joffrey is, without a doubt, the most evil character in the Game of Thrones. Callous, selfish, cruel, sadistic and not very intelligent, he is a blight on Kings Landing and the throne - and everyone loves it when Tyrion slaps him. Cersei isn’t blinkered to the flaws of her son. She sees what he is and how truly awful he is - and has expressed so with Tyrion on more than once. She has told Sansa that she knows she will not be happy as Joffrey’s queen and she’s fully aware of the atrocities he’s committed, whether it’s slaughtering babies or having prostitutes brutalised.

Yet, she is still driven to protect and support him. She still worries about him when he goes into battle, she still wants to save him, she is still driven to support him. She is bound to the loathsome boy and even as she sees his crimes, she cannot turn away from him. She doesn’t even get any power from being the mother of the king as she is increasingly both outmaneuvered by Tyrion and, ultimately, unable to curb the excesses and foolishness of her son. Her son is a burden, something to endure.

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Anita is faced with a new challenge- a professional hitman. For vast sum of money, someone is paying professionals to kill her – and kill her quickly. In many ways this is far more terrifying than anything she has faced before – she has faced witches and werewolves, vampires and even faeries all with murderous intent, but never a coldly professional human killing her for business. And never one willing to use modern technology to do it.

She and Edward have to find a way to keep her alive and, for preference draw out both the hitmen and the person paying for them so they can be put out of business. Permanently.

Alas, she can’t focus on anything so simple as a death threat – not with werewolf politics playing such a large role. Tensions between Richard and his pack leader, Marcus are getting ever higher, with the pack splitting in half between the two contenders. Richard could defeat Marcus – but the only way to be the new king is to kill the old one – something Richard refuses to do. Marcus and Raina have no such compunctions and are doing their best to use his morality – and his vulnerable people – against him.

There’s also a visitor in town. Sabin is a vampire who has given up blood and has suffered from a virulent disease because of it, rotting alive. It’s hoped that Anita’s powers as a Necromancer may be able to cure him. But to do that involves Anita exploring her powers with both Richard and Jean-Claude and discovering how their magic can work together – which could also be useful in making Marcus and Raina back down.

And of course, there is the big relationship conflict. Anita and Richard go ever closer but Jean-Claude is still there, demanding equal time. Anita has to make her choice – and deal with the fallout of it when she does. To say nothing of the standard dramas of vampire politics, new arrivals and the drama they can bring.

As ever with Anita Blake, I love how we have several separate storylines yet they all come together. Anita has a busy life but you see how the threads are connected at the end. The only thing I will say is that it’s becoming expected now – an established part of Hamilton’s style that we don’t expect side-plots to be side-plots per se, but more likely a separate branch of the main plot we haven’t seen yet. Still it’s interesting, really well done, comes together elegantly with excellent pacing and the right amount of attention paid to each line. The clues are there, even if you don’t put them together until hindsight. It’s, in short, a brilliant mystery story. Well paced, information well delivered and action, tension and theme well maintained. The world building was also extremely well done, there were some lectures but always within appropriate context and never just info-dumped. Questions were answered but not over explained and plenty was shown as well as told.

I like the wordiness of Anita’s point of view, it sets them theme, adds context, world building and wonderful snarky commentary as well as having an almost noir feeling to it. It is something I’ve liked in previous books as well. But this book definitely crosses the line into over-description, especially with the men. There is too much description of how she and Richard interacts, of what Richard looks like and even of Richard’s house – I really didn’t need an itemised list of Richard’s furniture, or details like his washing up. And with so many vampires and people in spiffy clothes, there was just a lot more excessively lenthy description here that became dull and overdone. Some pages felt skippable simply because so much time was spent on Anita describing things or Richard’s angst train going round and round in circles.

There’s an interesting theme that’s ongoing about Richard’s self-acceptance and whether he could even endure Anita’s acceptance of him since he hates what he is so much. If she accepts him, when he is so awful, then doesn’t that say bad things about Anita? There’s a similarly huge conflict over Richard’s idealism. His morals aren’t wrong – but are they appropriate for his situation? And it’s all very well being willing to die for your convictions, but what about when people have supported you and rely on you for protection? What do you do to protect those you love and care about? Which, of course, also brings us to Sabin’s situation. To say nothing of Anita’s increasing willingness to kill when necessary.

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Vicki and Celluci meet jogging and discussing the ramifications of last episode. It seems that things are tense but Vicki is confident things will be fine between them. As an added bonus, she reassures Celluci they’ll be fine. Which doesn’t please me.  But more on that later.

Anyway, back to the plot – and a young couple are busy getting down to business, clothes come off and then she grows snakes and he turns to stone. Surprise gorgon! That’s got to put you off. Almost as much as the awful special effects.

The man’s (Brendan) modelling manager comes to Vicki to ask her to find him because she’s all he has in the world. Oh and he owes her $6,000. Celluci has recommended the case – which cases Coreen to suddenly start cheerleading for Celluci (and here was me thinking she was Team Henry) and acting like Vicki is unreasonable for not instantly forgiving him

Time for Vicki to do what she always does when she has a case – go see Henry. Yes I’ve ranted about this before as well – it’s a simple missing person’s case, Vicki, you’re a detective, you’re not even going to try and investigate before dragging the vampire in? This makes Vicki look so incapable and weak as detective that she can’t even begin to pursue a case without begging help from a vampire. How did she manage before Henry came along?

On to the nightclub where the man disappeared to pick up leads, speak to bar staff and eventually lead to the club owner (the gorgon), Elena who knows nothing, remembers nothing and has never had any trouble ever. Which is, of course, very very suspicious. In particular Henry heard her heartbeat race showing a lie and Vicki catches on that Elena mentioned “sexual predators” before she did –pointing to what she was thinking. Good detective work, I like it. Time for more Vicki and Henry flirting

Back to Coreen to check a website that Henry heard about in the club – a website where men post pictures of the women they’ve slept with. Yes, it’s classy. Thankfully Vicki treats it accordingly. But open for the women from Brendan’s profile has the club owner’s distinctive tattoo.

Celluci follows up to the same club asking questions because it has suddenly become a police matter, and starts flirting with Elena

Knowing she lied, Vicki and Henry go to her house – planning to enter unofficially (also known as breaking and entering). Out come the lock picks (or Henry entering through an upstairs window) and Henry hears a far-too-slow heart beat inside (wait, his hearing is that strong?) And inside they find a statue of Brendan – with the too slow heartbeat. Vicki and Henry rush out with the statue (and an acknowledgement and reminder of Vicki’s disability, at last) just as Celluci and the club owner bring the flirting home.

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We have complained a lot about the unnecessarily sexualised and frankly ridiculous covers on so many Urban Fantasy novels. In particular we have complained at how the covers so often do not reflect the people who are actually in the book - there is no way the protagonist we know would dress or pose like that.

What is unique this week is that we have looked at the Chicagoland Vampire series, a series we really like by Chloe Neill - and I have to pity Ms. Neill for having to watch her cover artists gradually lose their ever loving minds.

The cover of Some Girls Bite, the first book in the series. And it’s pretty much perfect - maybe the t-shirt isn’t entirely Merit, but this isn’t too far from how I pictured her and the cover looks pretty intriguing anyway. A good cover.

Now we move to book 2, Friday Night Bites, and we’re slipping. High heels have creeped in. There’s some navel peeking. We have a sexy lean.

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Alex Verus is a mage with a very interesting power - he can see into the future.  He owns a small magical shop in London by which he makes a living.  The dark mages are no fans of him after his escape from his master Richard and the council has little respect or use for him, that is until one day when when he is brought a very powerful key by Luna, the woman he considers to be his student.  Luna is cursed and anyone who gets to close to her risks being hurt or even dying through association. 

Alex does not immediately know the purpose of the cube Luna places in his care, but when he sees into the future that a dark mage will kill him if he discovers the cube, Alex knows that he has to protect it and by extension protect Luna.  All of the other mages with foresight leave town and Alex ignores the advice to do the same, because he realizes that doing so would be a death sentence for Luna.  Alex is quickly involved in a battle between the mages possess the fateweaver.  Both sides want his skills and the one thing that is certain is that both sides will kill him when he has served his purpose.  Can Alex keep himself and Luna alive?

A mage whose power is the ability to see into the future is quite fascinating.  Because he does not have an active power, Alex has to out think his opponent.  He has a few tools like a cloak that allows him to blend into his environment but his greatest weapon is his intelligence.  I really like that Jacka did this because far too often with male protagonists, power comes from physical force reducing a protagonist to nothing but a ridiculous super hero.

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This scene opens with  flashback of Herrick and Mitchell having an argument.  It seems that Mitchell wanted some company and Herrick was dead set against recruits. Herrick tells him that the old ones only ever turn someone once and that it is an eternal bond.  Apparently an heir inherits all of your secrets and potentially a savior. Herrick says, if something happens to you they can bring you back. 

In the present day, Nina wakes to George staring at her while she sleeps. Nina questions whether they are in an ideal baby raising environment. She says that they have to start thinking about the future and ensuring that the world is safe for their child. In his room, Mitchell looks through the newspapers for more news on the box car murders.  Instead of seeing the news on the murders, Annie notices an obituary for George’s father.  They gather around the kitchen table to tell George and Nina. George decides that he needs to go the service and when Nina offers to accompany him, he says that he needs to do this alone.

Upstairs in the attic, Herrick is riddled with pain. Mitchell approaches him and asks him if he wants him to make the pain go away.  Mitchell takes a knife and slices his arm open, saying “I can make you powerful again, I can make you strong again.”  Mitchell forces Herrick to drink saying that he needs to learn how to survive because he is finally happy and that he does not want to leave Annie.  When it does not have the effect that Mitchell desires he realizes that Herrick needs fresh human blood.

Standing in the shadows at his father funeral, George sees a man run away and follows him only to realize that it is his father.  George tells his father that he is a ghost and in return his father tells him that he is not a freak.  When George notices that his former phys ed teacher is comforting the other he is upset.

Back at the house a police officer rings the doorbell. Nina see this and heads back upstairs. George Sr. takes George to the trailer where he used to leiv.  He says that his wife left him and started dating George’s former teacher.  George is not pleased that his father didn’t fight hard enough to keep his wife.  George Sr. offers to make a cup of tea and George rolls his eye at the possibility of another ghost who makes tea he cannot drink. George explains to him about the door as they walk past the place where George Sr. died. Apparently, George Sr. died in a fire and this news really upsets George because all he can think about is the pain that he must have been in.

In the house, Nina is helping the detective clean up. Upstairs in the attack, Herrick lifts a panel so he can see and hear what is going on.  The smell of blood causes his fangs to descend. The detective tells Mitchell that she was sent to talk to him but Mitchell quickly denies any knowledge of the murders on the tube. Mitchell takes her to the door, and Annie asks Nina who she thinks gave the police Mitchells name. Nina calls George who says that she wants to be with him, but George says that he is fine and tells her hat George Sr. is a ghost.

George goes through the list with his father of the things that he might have unresolved, but none of his efforts make an difference. George Sr. suggests that George should go and see his mother when he is gone, but George says no.  Nina shows up at the trailer.

Back at the house, Annie is upset that someone tried to link him to death of 20 innocent people.  She tells him that she knows that something is worrying him and asks him to tell her. Mitchell starts to tell her about Daisy, and suggests that Daisy alone committed this crime. He tells her that they have a code about not ratting each other out, but Annie says that if he won’t protect himself that she will. Upstairs, Herrick had made his way to the bathroom. He takes the blood kleenex out of the waste basket and sucks the blood out of it. 

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Wasting Away was released in 2007 and stars Matthew Davis, Julianna Robinson and Michael Grant Terry.  At a  secret military base the government is attempting to make a super soldier.  They inject a soldier with formula and it  turns him into zombie.  Realizing that they need to get rid of it, they label the tins of it baby formula and begin to transport it.  Along route the transport is forced to stop when  a an in a motorcycle rids into the middle of the road.

The formula rolls off the truck and somehow ends up outside a bowling alley where Mike, Vanessa, Tim, and Cindy are hanging out before Mike opens the alley for the day.  Tim grabs a tin of the formula mistaking it for a keg of beer and tosses it into the ice cream maker with the smart idea of making beer ice cream.  When it comes out green, Tim tells the others that it’s just the light and so they consume it quickly.  They die and become zombies but don’t realize it.  When Cindy starts to complain that she is in pain, they attempt to use the phone but discover that something is wrong with it.

They head out into the street and try to approach a couple of guys that they run into but the group runs from them.  The movie switches to black and white and we see that Mike Vanessa Tim and Cindy shambled towards the group of men groaning.  Clearly what the men saw was a group of zombies and that is why they ran away.  Mike, Vanessa, Tim, and Cindy are confused until they run into Nick Steele, who tells them that he is special ops and that the population has been infected.

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Ser Davros is leading Stannis’s fleet to Kings Landing and, as is usual with Ser Davros the Onion knight, we get some more exposition as he speaks to his extremely devout and fanatical son.

In Kings Landing Tyrion wakes next to Shae, discussing the war, how he has no choice but to fight it and admitting his fear while Shae again makes it clear her loyalty is with him. Cersei is having her own council before the war – with Maester Pycelle , giving her a potion that would help her sleep or be used as a powerful poison.

Bronn is partying on the eve of battle (including naked women, of course) and singing in rather good harmony, actually. It seems that the soldiers of the Lannisters could double as a decent choir. But the revelry is interrupted by Sandor Clegane, the Hound and he and Bronn lock horns. Sandor to strip the illusions from Bronn and make his cold violence and love of killing seem more honest. The show down as to who is the most dangerous of the 2 is averted by an alarm bell ringing.

Varys and Tyrion are indulging in some verbal sparring while Tyrion puts on his armour. Varys has a map of tunnels under Kings Landing through which they can escape if necessary (though Tyrion is determined to stay, for which Varys has a wonderful little snarky barb). Varys also reveals he knows about Mellisandre, the priestess of Asshai that Stannis has – and that he believes in her sorcery and that Stannis has used the dark powers to gain his army. Something Varys considers intolerable.

Tyrion and Bronn  have a moment (I do like Bronn) and Tyrion sees Sansa has been called to see Joffrey off (rather than stay in the most secure keep), Tyrion also makes a point of pretending not to know Shae. Sansa pledges to pray for Tyrion’s safe return just as she does for Joffrey – now make of that what you will! Sansa’s getting good at these little barbs. Unfortunately, Joffrey arrives (alas, may something kill him soon) and calls Sansa like a dog. Sansa shows more of her devious cleverness as she manipulates Joffrey to fight in the Vanguard.

Cersei and Sansa retire to the secure keep, with Ser Ilyn (the mute executioner) standing by to guard them and to execute any servants trying to flee the castle with full pockets. Cersei busies herself getting drunk and trying to teach Sansa hard lessons about being a queen.

Cersei continues to get drunk while Sansa prays. Cersei reveals some more about how hard she is and why. She encourages Sansa to drink and expresses her frustration about being trapped and discusses how she would use seduction to win over their attackers if it weren’t for it being Stannis. She speaks frankly and callously to Sansa about what happens when a city falls and how the women in the room are likely to be raped, including Sansa.

Cersei speaks about how she and Jaime were treated so differently even as children when they looked almost identical. It’s a really good, angry summation of the fierce and rigid gender roles in Westeros and how much they devalue and demean women and Cersei in particular. Sansa protests that she was Robert’s queen but Cersei artfully points out that Sansa will be Joffrey’s queen and she’s unlikely to be happy about it. She also notices and question’s Shae – whose actions and inability to curtsy rouse Cersei’s suspicions.

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Continuum has one of the most interesting premises that have seen on television in a long time. It begins in 2077 with a terrorist bombing which killed 38,000 people to kill 20. In the year 2057, corporations bailed out the failed government and society is now run by corporations. It’s meant a loss of representation, free speech and assembly.  Instead of having a distinction Canada and America, there is one united North American Union.

The group responsible is due for execution and so Kiera Cameron a police detective is called in.  She is married with a child and seems to work out of Vancouver District Prison.  At the execution, gestures between the prisoners lead Kiera to believe that something untoward is about to happen and so reaches out and touches one of the captives, only to be transported with them back to the year 2012.

At first Kiera doesn’t even realize she has left her own time and goes chasing after the suspects, while asking for help using a chip that has been implanted in her brain. Instead of reaching the authorities, she reaches Alec Sadler, who at first believes that she has hacked his computer systems.  Kiera manages to catch up with Lucas who tells her that they have shifted in time. It seems that they had only intended to go back 6 years in time and instead traveled 60 years.  Lucas tells her that they cannot get in and that they have to become ghosts and blend in. Kiera hides when the police show up, leaving Lucas to get arrested..

Alec has been listening to the entire exchange and then tells her that the tech that they have been using has not been circulated and again asks again how she has the tech.  The other time shifters are confused and worried that Lucas is who is the only one who knows what happened is not with them.  Kiera asks what’s going on and tells Alec that she is from the year 2077 and he still believes that this is an elaborate ruse until using the implant from her brain, she shows him images from the previous day. When she logs off for the night, Alec goes back through her memories and spies a logo for his company.

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